Today I had the chance to reminisce on the old fun train days. The days when I didn't give a crap about anything, when I could drive and drive and not get tired. Those days are long gone, but looking back now, I would give anything to live so carefreely. True, it's immature to live like that for too long, but boy were those days good.
This... growing up that everyone speaks of, planning for the future, people getting married, working towards a career, moving on..., I don't like it. But what does that matter right? Life goes on no matter what, and the things that happen to us, whether bad or good, happen so that we can learn and grow. What have I learned? That patience is a lost luxury in our quick paced world, persistence is seen as obsession, and good things become taken for granted. I don't want to be like that. I want to be someone that is patient in all circumstances, persistent in the things that I care for, and treasure the blessings that have been showered upon me. I do not want to end up viewing things through a negative lens, but rather through eyes of compassion and love.
Lord, if there's been any time that I've ever needed you more, I think now probably tops it.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
getting back on track.
Today's message at Harbor was something that came at just the right time. It was something that I needed to hear, something I needed to understand, and something I need to apply to my life. I am at the point where I don't know what I'm exactly doing, but I'm trusting that this is where I need to be.
It's been too long since I've been "on track" and it just took today's message to give me that push to do what I need to do. For me, this is probably one of the hardest things I'll have to do this year, and maybe even my college career. But knowing that I have to let go in order to hold onto God gives me hope.
Please don't get me wrong, I'm not bitter, I'm not angry, I'm just trying to get out of this rut that I've been holding onto. And it's damn difficult. As much as I don't want to do anything, and just leave things as is, this is not good for me. Things have been too hard for too long.
I don't remember when the last time I was "on track," but I know it has been too long. It's time to be joyful again and get on track.
It's been too long since I've been "on track" and it just took today's message to give me that push to do what I need to do. For me, this is probably one of the hardest things I'll have to do this year, and maybe even my college career. But knowing that I have to let go in order to hold onto God gives me hope.
Please don't get me wrong, I'm not bitter, I'm not angry, I'm just trying to get out of this rut that I've been holding onto. And it's damn difficult. As much as I don't want to do anything, and just leave things as is, this is not good for me. Things have been too hard for too long.
I don't remember when the last time I was "on track," but I know it has been too long. It's time to be joyful again and get on track.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
never lose.
Today I was humbled, by a 2nd grader. During kids/youth combined service, we played "would you rather..."
One of the questions went something like this:
"Would you rather lose every game you play, or never play any games at all?"
Thinking nothing of the question, it was pretty easy walking over to the "never play any games" side. One little girl (among almost all the kids) went to the side of losing every game that they played. When asked why she chose to lose every game she played, she responded, "I would lose every game so that others would have a chance to win."
And it hit me... my competitiveness, and desire to win blinds me to understand how life is not really about winning. It's about trying your hardest, and giving glory to God in our wins and losses. Such an easy message to preach, but such a hard one to remember.
Needless to say, it was pretty hard to swallow, but today I was taught by a second grader.
One of the questions went something like this:
"Would you rather lose every game you play, or never play any games at all?"
Thinking nothing of the question, it was pretty easy walking over to the "never play any games" side. One little girl (among almost all the kids) went to the side of losing every game that they played. When asked why she chose to lose every game she played, she responded, "I would lose every game so that others would have a chance to win."
And it hit me... my competitiveness, and desire to win blinds me to understand how life is not really about winning. It's about trying your hardest, and giving glory to God in our wins and losses. Such an easy message to preach, but such a hard one to remember.
Needless to say, it was pretty hard to swallow, but today I was taught by a second grader.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
engaged
First of all congratulations to Victor and Catherine on the engagement!
I think the pictures will speak louder than my words
Once again congrats to my dear friend!
I think the pictures will speak louder than my words
This is going to be one fun bridal party!!
Once again congrats to my dear friend!
Monday, February 20, 2012
down?
I miss the fun train days. The days when things were pretty much carefree. When the word "down" actually meant going to wild places, and not just playing a game of madden or nfl blitz.
And so in lieu of my last year 2 quarters in SD, I have put into place the "I'm down rule"
the "I'm down rule" states that...
if anybody challenges me to be down to do something, I must do it. If the other person does it with me, and I am financially capable of doing it.
exceptions: cannot interfere with work (more than once per pay period)
cannot interfere with ministry responsibilities
cannot harm my health
Goal of the "I'm down rule" is to go bigger my senior year than my freshmen+sophomore year.
The first challenge after taking it upon myself to use this rule began at 4:00 a.m. this morning.
While hanging out with some friends, someone threw out the idea of going to Arizona to visit the hometown of one of my good friends, Abraham, for the day. Not really knowing exactly how far it was, or how long it would take, the words "I'm down" spewed out of my mouth before I had a chance to think it through. By the time it was said, there was no turning back. Freshmen year YY wouldn't have backed down, so... why would senior YY. hahaha.
So by 5:00 we were off to the land of Abraham
and some new panoramic pics (I'm still noob)
time to go big or go home.
And so in lieu of my last year 2 quarters in SD, I have put into place the "I'm down rule"
the "I'm down rule" states that...
if anybody challenges me to be down to do something, I must do it. If the other person does it with me, and I am financially capable of doing it.
exceptions: cannot interfere with work (more than once per pay period)
cannot interfere with ministry responsibilities
cannot harm my health
Goal of the "I'm down rule" is to go bigger my senior year than my freshmen+sophomore year.
The first challenge after taking it upon myself to use this rule began at 4:00 a.m. this morning.
While hanging out with some friends, someone threw out the idea of going to Arizona to visit the hometown of one of my good friends, Abraham, for the day. Not really knowing exactly how far it was, or how long it would take, the words "I'm down" spewed out of my mouth before I had a chance to think it through. By the time it was said, there was no turning back. Freshmen year YY wouldn't have backed down, so... why would senior YY. hahaha.
So by 5:00 we were off to the land of Abraham
Pictures of Abraham as a nice chunky kid.
10 hours of carride. legit.
and some new panoramic pics (I'm still noob)
time to go big or go home.
Friday, February 17, 2012
The devil on one shoulder, and an angel on the other.
If there was one way to describe the relationship between me and my parents is best described as the angel and devil on my shoulders.
My dad tells me to have fun, go with my gut, and just live up life. He plays the YOLO card and tells me to mess around and experiment with things (no not drugs, but with life). < He is the devil on my shoulder.
My mom tells me to be smart, to think before I act, and to lift things up to the Lord. < She is the angel.
Today, after a long talk about Jeremy Lin, our summer trip to Asia, my plans for Europe, and my future. He gives me the reminder that "You need to find a girlfriend." He gave one of his funny examples of why it's important to be in a relationship. Right after, I called my mom because I didn't understand a word that my dad kept saying in the conversation. She tried to keep talking to me, but since I'd been standing in front of the library for about an hour, I told her I needed to leave. 15 minutes later I received this e-mail..
Needless to say, my mom encourages me so much. And as much as it is funny to see how my parents fight even when they don't talk to each other, I know that in the end it's not about their quarrel. In the end its about raising me. God has blessed me with the "best of two worlds." And I wouldn't argue against that. But in these two worlds, God has blessed me with my very own angel, my momma.
My dad tells me to have fun, go with my gut, and just live up life. He plays the YOLO card and tells me to mess around and experiment with things (no not drugs, but with life). < He is the devil on my shoulder.
My mom tells me to be smart, to think before I act, and to lift things up to the Lord. < She is the angel.
Today, after a long talk about Jeremy Lin, our summer trip to Asia, my plans for Europe, and my future. He gives me the reminder that "You need to find a girlfriend." He gave one of his funny examples of why it's important to be in a relationship. Right after, I called my mom because I didn't understand a word that my dad kept saying in the conversation. She tried to keep talking to me, but since I'd been standing in front of the library for about an hour, I told her I needed to leave. 15 minutes later I received this e-mail..
Needless to say, my mom encourages me so much. And as much as it is funny to see how my parents fight even when they don't talk to each other, I know that in the end it's not about their quarrel. In the end its about raising me. God has blessed me with the "best of two worlds." And I wouldn't argue against that. But in these two worlds, God has blessed me with my very own angel, my momma.
Monday, February 13, 2012
survived!
Today was probably one of the longestest days, but was incredibly fun.
Harbor in the morning for Fusion.
Boned out right after service to pick up my br0der and get ready for the wedding.
Got to the wedding, and sat through a ceremony that was very much like a church service. (Awesome worship sets, and a good message by Pastor Ben Shin)
Reception was really fun, got to hang out with good ole friends that I haven't seen in a while. And it was probably one of the most fun receptions cause there was never a dull moment.
Came home and hung out with JY again (in-n-out and show as usual)
And got back to SD at 1:30.
Today, I was reminded of how important it is to cherish those around you. When things are tough, and when things are good, we need to joyfully and boldly love those around us. And when it gets hard to love people, during those frustrating times, that's when we need to push for it even more.
and to end this post with a some fun photo booth pics!
the DB + LA creww (eric was supposed to kiss me not slap me....)
Merced crewww + OG Merced Funtrainerzz - Jackie Lee
Harbor in the morning for Fusion.
Boned out right after service to pick up my br0der and get ready for the wedding.
Got to the wedding, and sat through a ceremony that was very much like a church service. (Awesome worship sets, and a good message by Pastor Ben Shin)
Reception was really fun, got to hang out with good ole friends that I haven't seen in a while. And it was probably one of the most fun receptions cause there was never a dull moment.
Came home and hung out with JY again (in-n-out and show as usual)
And got back to SD at 1:30.
Today, I was reminded of how important it is to cherish those around you. When things are tough, and when things are good, we need to joyfully and boldly love those around us. And when it gets hard to love people, during those frustrating times, that's when we need to push for it even more.
and to end this post with a some fun photo booth pics!
the DB + LA creww (eric was supposed to kiss me not slap me....)
Merced crewww + OG Merced Funtrainerzz - Jackie Lee
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
a glimmer of hope.
I see the light at the end of this tunnel. It's been a long tough journey, and I know now that because I am able to give up my struggles to the Lord that I am able to overcome these obstacles. What has a beginning must have an ending, and no matter how difficult things become, God is with me always, and I have nothing to fear.
I find myself being pretty happy these days, and not being afraid of being me. Thank God!
I find myself being pretty happy these days, and not being afraid of being me. Thank God!
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
good day.
It's been a while since I've had a good day like today. The past 2 weeks I've went to an hour and a halfs worth of class, napped an average of 3 times a day, and just lazied around for the most part.
But today was definitely one of the best days I've had. Slept a good amount, got some errands and e-mails sent out, went to a doctors appointment, cleaned the apartment, took my family around UCSD, the cliffs, Phil's, and then to top off the night got to hang out with my apartment. I played like 4 rounds of NFL Blitz with David, watched 5 episodes of Impractical Jokers and had a really good laugh.
I know I never really blog about my day, but today was such a blessing. To be surrounded by such great friends and family is something I forget so often. 16 weeks left til I graduate, and it makes me realize how little time I have here in San Diego. I pray that I will be reminded of His goodness each day.
But today was definitely one of the best days I've had. Slept a good amount, got some errands and e-mails sent out, went to a doctors appointment, cleaned the apartment, took my family around UCSD, the cliffs, Phil's, and then to top off the night got to hang out with my apartment. I played like 4 rounds of NFL Blitz with David, watched 5 episodes of Impractical Jokers and had a really good laugh.
I know I never really blog about my day, but today was such a blessing. To be surrounded by such great friends and family is something I forget so often. 16 weeks left til I graduate, and it makes me realize how little time I have here in San Diego. I pray that I will be reminded of His goodness each day.
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